Monday, July 9, 2012

Quotable RizzIsles: Episode 3.04 -- "Welcome to the Dollhouse"

Case: Women left at bus stops dressed like dolls, and in clothes from early 90s.
RizzIsles: Jane is depressed about Casey; Maura talks to Casey and gets him to talk to Jane… after Angela also interferes.

Maura: We’re running this morning.  C’mon.
Jane: Too late I already showered.
Maura: (sniffing Jane) Last night or this morning?  Never mind!
Jane: No, my stomach is too full.
Maura: You need endorphins from physical activity because you’re depressed.
Jane: I’m not depressed. (smiles) See?
Maura: You'll get over Casey.
Jane: Wh-- who said it has anything to do with Casey?  I- I got a new ding in my car door.
Maura: You lied.  Your left eyebrow moved. You are in stage 4 of the 5 stages of relationship grief.
Jane: I am in 5 stages of ignoring you.  I can’t taste, touch, smell, see or hear you.
Maura: Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.

Jane: (looking down at plate) Why'd she have to make bunnies?
Rondo: (walking by) Mmm.  I like the bunnies. Taste better when they got shape. (Angela gives him plate of bunny pancakes; Jane gives him hers too) You sure?
Jane: Yea.
Rondo: Cause I don't want you losin any more weight.  I like my detectives with a little weight on them.
(Maura gives Jane an I-told-you-so smirk)

Jane: (to Angela) You’ve been giving free food to Rondo and that’s why the sandwiches cost 12 bucks?

Jane: Oh, we got a murder.  (looks at Maura in workout clothes)  You gonna run to the crime scene?
Maura: Give me 5 minutes.
Jane: 3.

Jane: Anything ending in –philia is not going to be good.
Maura: A fetish involving a love between a man and a doll.
Jane: A man, a doll his love, and what?  …a 2x4, a hammer, hockey stick?
Maura: Definitely a solid, high density object.  In common par lens, something hard.
Jane: Brilliant deduction.

Jane: You’re telling me this, why, because she was transported here from the 90s?
Maura: No detective smarty pants.  I tell you this because her clothes are 20 years old and they don’t fit her.

Maura: You should tell Jane.
Casey: No.  And you won’t either.  Ever.  You have to promise me that.
Maura: I don’t know that I can make that promise.  She’s my friend.

(To Casey)
Maura: Jane is suffering.  It’s mean to not tell her.  The truth isn’t as bad as what she’s imagining.

Jane: Eep. I am a robot.  Eep.  I do not compute human talk.
Maura: I do not use that inflection.  And that is the storage space on a b-cap card.
Jane: That’s riveting.
Maura: (smirking) I’m going to the gym.  And even though you’re rude, you’re coming with me.
Jane: No.  Thank you.  I’m too tired to workout.
Maura: Then let’s go to the Dirty Robber.  I’ll even have a beer with you.
Jane: No.  I’m gonna go workout on my couch.  The 5 stages of junk food.

Maura: (To Angela) You have to swear that you will never mention to Jane what I’m about to tell you.  (Places a Gray’s Anatomy book on the table)

Angela: Well then he’s a fool.  I can tell she really likes him.
Maura: (solemnly) I think she loves him.

Maura: Blunt force trauma.  Hm.  Remarkable.  It is the same.
Jane: Same weapon?
Maura: Same scrunchie.

Jane: So our victims were either transported from the 90s.  OR they work for Hilary Clinton.  Or our killer is a scrunchie freak.

Jane: Have you been drinking?
Maura: Yes.  Water.  2 liters a day as recommended by the Mayo Clinic.

Jane: I’ve been thinking about what you said about him being tender.
Maura: Casey?
Jane: No, Maura, the killer.  And stop saying that name.
Maura: Exposure therapy might help you get over it.  Casey.  Casey.  Casey.  Casey.
Jane: Stop it.
Maura: I’m trying to help.

(In response to “Angela’s Guardians” on the news)
Cavanaugh: It’s gonna be Angela’s Ashes when I’m through with her.

(To Angela saying they have to help Jane)
Maura: No.  Whatever it is you’re thinking of doing, don’t.  It’s none of our business.

Jane: I don’t believe this.
Maura: If that is a text from a vacation club in Acapulco don’t respond.  It might be a scam.

(To Casey as he’s trying to leave angrily)
Jane: Wait.  I didn’t write this.  But if you had told me I would have said the same thing.  It doesn’t matter.  It doesn’t matter.

(To Casey as he leaves the bar)
Maura: I knew you weren’t mean.

Maura: How did it go?
Jane: I asked him to go rollerblading.
Maura: Shut the front door.  You did not.
Jane: I think I might have also suggested running.
(Shows Maura the note Angela wrote to Casey)
Maura: Your mother is (in unison with Jane) a deadwoman.

What was your favorite line/scene/quote from this episode?  Please let me know if I missed it so I can include it too! :) Happy RizzIsles obsessing!!

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