Every once in a while fictional characters come along that become part of you just like someone you actually know... you can be introduced to these characters in a book or even a movie. Or they can come from a TV show and let you really get to know them over time. The characters this blog is dedicated to are from the show "Rizzoli & Isles". Their brilliance, humor, friendship and strength are worth exploring and celebrating!
Quotable RizzIsles: Episode 2.05 -- "Don't Hate the Player"
Case: A specialty
coach for an MLB team is found dead in the locker room; Maura declares it a
suspicious death causing a conspiracy to unfold.
deals with her brother Tommy coming home and goes out with a baseball player;
Maura is allowing Tommy to stay in the guest house with Angela
Jane: Do what?
their crotches. (holds up a fist) It’s a
sign of aggression.
Maura: He is
quite the male specimen. (watching commercial of Manny Mega
Vega) I’d love to Mega him!
language. My mother’s here.
should hear us when you’re not around policing us. He’s a hunk.
Jane: Hunk? Okay, I’m officially throwing up in my mouth.
(Door opens, HOT
guy walks in)
Jane: Oh my
God, Tommy. (smiling, standing up)
forgot to tell you he was coming home.
Jane: You forgot to tell me?
(to Maura) You forget too? (Maura
Tommy: Jane! (hugging
Jane) Thanks for the letters. They
really kept me going.
Jane: (in response to Tommy’s comment to
Maura) Allllllll you’re doing for
just visiting your mother.
means dropping by then leaving. When’s
he’s gonna be in violation of his probation without a permanent address.
Jane: So the
visit is permanent.
Jane: The only
thing Tommy does temporarily is stay out of trouble.
Maura: Jane I
know you. You’re conflicted. You want to help him but you’re afraid that
anything you do will be interpreted as a sign of approval.
Jane: (grabbing Maura’s arms) My little
brother is a screw up, Maura. A
completely loveable, screw up, FELON.
Maura: The repeat
rate is higher for non-violent offenders is higher than for violent. 46-39%.
Jane: So I’m
thinking this isn’t a good idea.
doing this for your mother…
go. I’ve never been to Pilgrim’s Stadium
and their locker room is closer than your couch. C’mon.
always wanted to see them without their uniforms.
Jane: (smiling) Maura!
Tommy: (sweetly, hesitantly) Listen, I know
you’re busy. If you want I can take your
dog to the vet.
Jane: (annoyed) No, your only job is to stay
out of trouble, okay? (walks away)
Baseball Player: Call
me. I wouldn’t mind being interrogated
heard that one… like a million times.
me and I’ll think of a new one.
Jane: (smiling) Alright.
does your gut say?
Maura: I don’t
listen to my intestines.
murder weapon is a cylindrical hard object.
Jane: (watching crime lab check a baseball bat) Gee. What could it be? Think it’s a pipe?
Maura: Pipe is
about a Majorette’s baton?
glad you find my scientific approach amusing.
Jane: I think
it’s a bat, Maura. I think it’s Manny
Jane: Now how
do we prove it was Manny who swung the fatal blow?
Maura: The way
you always do. Do that gumshoe thing.
gumshoe thing. No, um, this time, we’re actually
up against every baseball fan from judges to the governor so it makes it a
little difficult to do my gumshoe thing.
is very reluctant to hold celebrities accountable. Remember Fatty Arbuckle?
silent film star who was tried--
Jane: No. (holding
hand out to Maura) Stop.
(Maura rolls her
eyes and stops talking)
off. To do my “gumshoe thing”. (smiling)
shouldn’t have used that term.
Jane: No, you
it actually refers to galoshes which you aren’t wearing. (laughing,
very amused at herself; Jane rolls her eyes and leaves) What?
(confused) What did I say??
didn’t tell you to stop, Rizzoli. Now
find a way to get to Vega.
Korsak: Nice! Cavanaugh just took the gloves off. C’mon!
Wade gave me his phone number. Maybe
it’s time to make a call.
Frost: (smirking) Yea a booty call.
Jane: What is
La Beaux Trup?
Maura: 5 star
French Restaurant. Brilliant new take on
Jane: (gesturing to her clothes) This okay?
Maura: Are you
out of your mind?!
Jane: What? I’m meeting Jesse Wade. He wants to do the interview there.
Maura: At La
Jane: (trying not to laugh) What did you just
know. (removes her jacket, turns around, Jane looks on confused) Unzip
you can’t go like that. (gesturing to Jane’s outfit, horrified) We’ll trade clothes. C’mon.
Jane: (in pure disbelief) Are you crazy?! That dress wouldn’t cover my… booty. (Maura
gives Jane a look; flash to Jane in Maura’s dress and her combat boots) It smells like a deco.
Maura: Men are
not attracted to the smell of death.
Jane: Really? (Maura
sprays Jane with body spray) Okay
that’s enough. (squirming like a child)
Maura: (disgusted glance at Jane’s feet) Oh. Those boots are fashion homicide. (Takes
off her shoes to give to Jane)
Jane: No. No.
No! Those shoes are foot
Jane: (pouting) They’re too small.
Jane: You just
said put them on.
Maura: (lifts a finger to Jane as she takes the shoes)
Patience. (Comes back with shoes and a scalpel)
Jane: (gasps) Maura!
Maura: Voila! Peep toes!
Jane: (smiling) Thank you. (puts
look… like you’re wearing my clothes.
Jane: (into cell) Hey Ma. Tommy.
Why do you have Ma’s phone?
Okay. Calm down! Alright.
Where are you? Okay, I’ll be
right--. (hangs up phone) I’ve got 45
minutes. Come with me. I’m gonna need back up.
Maura: What? Jane?!
What did Tommy do?! Jane! You have all the shoes!
(Tommy yelling at
Vet: I called
Jane: I am the
Vet: …and this
man is refusing to pay the bill.
fine. I got it.I will pay the bill. How
much is it?
Jane: What?! Did you bling her paws out?!
Tommy: Exactly! Then he calls her a friggin head case.
Vet: No, no
no. I did not use that terminology. I said she has been suffering from
Maura: She has
been withdrawn. Restless, refusing to go
outside and urinate.
Jane: (to Maura) Whose side are you on? (to
Vet) She sleeps, eats, poops. What’s there to be depressed about?
Vet: (points to Jo Friday licking paws) It is an OCD reflex. It is triggered by her emotional state. She needs prozak.
Tommy: See?! There it is… OCD, ADHD, alcoholic. It was the same stuff they were throwing at
me in the joint.
Vet: I’m not
surprised you were confined to a cage.
(Tommy lunges at
Vet; Jane breaks it up)
Jane: Hey! Hey, hey hey!
Knock it off! Take Jo Friday,
walk it off.
Maura: (to Vet) I’m so sorry. They really are very nice people.
into Maura’s house)
Jane: (pulling off shoes) These, suck! And your dress is about as comfortable as a
And your suit is a really booty call magnet. I got hit on twice... by women.
broke into some houses when he was in high school. He never should have been staying here,
Maura, I’m so sorry. (emotional, hand to her chest)
okay. (grabs Jane’s arm in comfort)
Oh for the life of me! I
don’t understand why your brother does what he does!
I’ll call Frankie and we’ll go look for him.
If he’s on the run it should be us that find him. Okay?
Detective Rizzoli, Officer Rizzoli and Tommy the Screw Up.
what you’ve chosen it’s not who you are.
you have that “I have a case solving hunch” look on your face.
Maura: My face
doesn’t hunch. It’s minor paritis.
kidneys are damaged. Look at the
yea. From what?
Maura: I’d be
Jane: (eye closed, whispering to herself) God,
it’s torture sometimes. (to Maura)
Have you seen this before?
Jane: Okay. Good.
What did it turn out to be, before?
Jane: Antifreeze. Someone was poisoning him.
why aren’t you there? Oh, I know… ew! I
hate eyeball fluid. Ew! I can’t stand garbage.
Frost: Why aren’t you there? Oh I know… it might ruin that sport coat from
1989. (amused glance from Maura)
players are really superstitious right?
MacGuire wore the same cup from his high school years until it was stolen from
him late in his career.
put tiger balm on his bal— (clears
balls?? Don’t they inspect those before they’re allowed to pitch? (giggles
balls, Dr. Isles.
Maura: Oh! (Jane
Maura: This is
not CSI Boston, Jane. Okay, it’s a very
delicate process and it’s not always successful.
Jane: It’d be
great if it were successful this time. (exasperated look from Maura)
Maura: I can’t
concentrate. Did you apologize to Tommy?
Jane: No, not
yet. But I will. Let’s catch the bad guys first.
don’t you go apologize to him and I’ll call you if I get any prints.
Jane: IF?! N—the reason you have these gloves to work
with is because I gumshoed. The least you can do is get me some prints. (Maura
stops, crosses her arms and leans against table) Wha—what are you doing? Why are you stopping?
for you to leave.
Jane: You are
ridiculous. C’mon. (look
from Maura) Alright, fine, bye. (Jane
Jane: Go home.
Tommy: I don’t
have a home.
Jane: Yes you
do. Maura said you can stay as long as
you need to. Ma wants you there. Maura wants you there.
know what’s great about dogs?
Jane: Tell me.
in the same mood every day, and they think I’m a good guy.
good judges of character, Tommy.
like a serial killer if he had lamb on him.
sorry Tommy. I’m really, really sorry.
okay. I would’ve thought I did it too. I gotta walk ‘em. I’m on the job.
Jane: You’re a
dog walker? That’s great!
Tommy: Oh yea,
mom and dad would be so proud.
Korsak: You feed that dog chicken?
lickin her paws?
nonstop. The Vet says she
depressed. (Korsak laughing) What? It’s not funny. I paid 300 bucks and she’s still licking.
a lot of little dogs like her are allergic to poultry.
(Jane gives Maura
stern look, Maura flinches)
Jane: (mocking tone) Well she has been withdrawn and restless. Reluctant to go outside and urinate.
me! I don’t treat mixed breeds or
4-legged creatures, or anything else that's--.
Jane: Alive? Yea I know. (glare from Maura) Angela: (in background) Would you two knock it
you like me to reimburse you for misdiagnosing your dog?
that’d be great.
Angela: (in background) Stop it!
check be okay or would you feel safer with cash?
cash is good.
GIFs not mine >> I save awesome stuff after I reblog it. My Tumblr page has original links (JaMauraRizzles on the RizzIsles blog)